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    May 29th, 2012 at 12:46:38     -    Super Columbine Massacre (Arcade)

    Session 3 - overall reflection

    I continue to play the game and I realized the extra stuff you can do within the actual school. You are able to go to certain computers and pull out information from it as well. I wanted to know if the pictures that show up in the background after you gun down like ten people are real. I googled it and I wasn't really able to find the pictures that I saw match that of google; this doesn't mean those aren't real.†

    As I was playing I wanted to know why the creator of the game doesn't give the gamers the ability to choose more often. I mean there are a lot of options out there and you are able to find hidden stuff like the computer giving you information. But, many times when people create historical games they give you more choices. For example, in games like Oregon Trail you are able to make your own choices that are portrayed in a western society. I think that the creator should have pushed for more choice in making the game.

    I think it is interesting to note that this game forces you to play as the bad guy. I think that games many times allow you to choose the route that you feel comfortable in doing so. But, this game really forces you to get in the head of Eric and Dylan therefore you have to make the choices that they were offered the day of the shootings.†

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    May 28th, 2012 at 22:57:11     -    Super Columbine Massacre (Arcade)

    Session 2

    Last session I really focused on how to get used to the game not just the controls but the overall plot of the game as well. This time I really wanted to try and solve the game and play it the way it was made to be played. After figuring out how to plant the bombs in the cafť, I had to start killing people that were coming out. I found myself killing the people and still dealing with this issue of whether killing someone in a video game is the same concept as killing someone in real life. Over many months now, we have discussed that there are so many different interpretations of the idea of killing. Throughout the course I thought that killing someone in a video game was actually not the same as killing someone in real life because you really only had to deal with a virtual game exerting this concept of killing. But, because of the intensity of this game and the background that this game has, I found myself pondering on this question a lot. I continued to subconsciously kill people within the game facing this thought that maybe killing people in a video game can actually be harmful and could bring out the worst in us. But, then I also started to juggle with the concept is it really the video game that brings out the worst in us and forces us to kill in real life. This is where I remember some of the dialogue that was said after you picks up the Doom CD. I remember that the two shooters talk about how people will think that it is because of video games or bad parenting that allows us to get on this kind of path but really it was neither of those because they had the intent to kill in the first place. So I guess while I was playing my second session I kind of got over the fact that of this issue because if you have the intent of killing someone is different from killing them subconsciously because it is part of the video game.

    Soon I started to put away my thoughts and really play the game. I started to feel like this game wasnít really that good. I felt like it was trying to portray the message that was sent that day rather than creating a game like regular RPGs. The creator of the game really wanted gamers to do what he wanted them to do; there was not many choices and it was very restrictive. I started to get bored of the game pretty fast actually and was really just thought as if the creator of the game was trying to control everything. After killing so many people I am still trying to figure out what the creator of the game is trying to get at.

    The real question is what is the real goal or what is the ultimate ending to this story. I mean I am sure it ends in a way where Eric and Dylan kill each other because that is what happened in real life but what is the point of all of this. I think they should add some more incentive in the shooter-part of the game. Especially because once you start to complete the mission and see the bombs fail you start to wonder if the game is just about killing random people or is it really trying to get somewhere.

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    May 27th, 2012 at 22:32:46     -    Super Columbine Massacre (Arcade)

    This is my first entry for Super Columbine Massacre RPG on PC. Before I started this game I was remembering the events of the Columbine massacre and started to get mixed emotions of playing it in general because of the horrific acts that occurred that day. But, as the game turned on I realized that it was made like any other RPG game. I started out in Ericís room and I was able to pick up a variety of different items like any other usual video game. I found it interesting that if you are picking up items within his room, or any area that Eric is comfortable with, he starts to give a little bit of knowledge about the item in general. I soon started to realize that the actual items that you pick up can help your character out as well. I really like how the game depicts the character because we often hear or have heard about the shooting through the eyes of the media or some of the victims families; but at least in my case I have never heard of the story through the eyes of either of the shooters. Therefore, when they give a little description of items its interesting to hear what the character wants out of each item and how that item can affect his thoughts or perceptions for the rest of his day.
    Really for the most part I was just trying to get used to the controls, the graphics, and the way the dialect of the game in general. I think itís important as a gamer and as student to understand that the dialogue that Eric has and the preparation Dylan does for the shooting really puts in perspective what they felt that day. Both of their explanations for the things they do have a huge impact on me as for understanding the actual incident. Really the first thirty minutes that I played this game I was trying to get over the fact that these two kids felt a certain way before going to school. Finally when I started to move the character to the school and started to shoot things up I realized how emotionally violent this game could get. I guess the reason why I say this is an emotionally violent game is because in games like the Grand Theft Auto series I canít really relate to what happened. I can never get on the emotional level as the character because I do not know what it feels like to be in an environment where gangs are the way of life. But, in this game I felt like I was able to connect with the character not because I have been in this kind of situation, especially since I havenít, but because I witnessed this situation on television. This massacre happened in my life time and because of that I was able to really get on an emotional level.
    Again, this is the first time I played the game and because I started to get so attached to the characters I actually started to feel bad to go in there and shoot people and carry out the rest of the game. I was not able to overcome it and actually started to feel like if I shot a student at the school I was actually shooting them in real life or if I brought in explosives I was truly going to hurt someone. So I decided that I wouldnít go through with the shooting on my first try and I restarted the game so I could just go around and do a little discovery. I was walking around trying to talk to people and really trying to figure out how this game was designed. After trying to figure out the game and running through a lot of the dialogue part of the game I will try to pick up the game again and start to play it as it is meant to be played and expand the character to what the author of the game has made him out to be.

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    Apr 19th, 2012 at 12:09:04     -    Grand Theft Auto - San Andreas (PS2)

    After playing this game a few times this will be my last entry. My player is starting to hate a lot of other gangs and is starting to get reputation as an ďup-comerĒ or someone who is starting to change the way things work around the area. But, I am also starting to see a lot of betrayal. The characters that I thought had my back, during all of the gang wars, turns out donít really care too much about CJ. I am trying to build up my gang as much as possible but as I do this I continually get shot at by other gang members in the street. In my last discussion of this game, I wanted to bring up accountability and politics really. It seems that you really have to watch yourself throughout the game because at any time your gangmembers could have a habit of turning on you or even the people closest to you could be against you. I think Rockstar has done a good job really exploiting this idea of fending for yourself. Just like Red Dead Redemption when the main character is left behind from his gang, I can start to see some similarities in CJís gang as well. I think that you expect to have characters who will always have your side on things but then you realize that they really donít. This is where accountabililty comes in a little bit too. For example CJís brother was basically used and then taken away, and really he was the only person that CJ could trust. Using that same example I can start to see spurts of politics within gang members being taken in place. Rockstar is making some characters that are truly selfish. Those characters love the gang they are in but only if it benefits them at the end. It is starting to become prevalent that many of the people around CJ are there to either prove something to other people or to take advantage of CJ in general.

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